You dont need skill to make a good 3d model. All you need is a half ass tutorial and a pic of what you're making and just make the details outta verts and faces lol(not really but it's the way I see it). As to the question of the difference, 3ds is gonna give you more powerful options, its mainly for higher poly stuff than esf needs but is good if your going for high poly stuff.
milkshape on the other hand, is more for game devs and people making meshes for games. It's easier to do face modeling in MS than in 3ds and would therefore be more appealing to most of us. its only if you want to get deeply into modeling and animation should you use 3ds.
Gmax is pretty kuch the same as milkshape as the others have stated but its mainly prefrence between those two. I would think MS was easier
whew:fight: