Corrupt a Wish - The Inevitable Return

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it doesn't, but you become addicted to it and lose your job, your wife, your kids, and finally your own life.

i wish i didn't suck at this.
 
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Wish granted, but you become so good that nobody wants to play with you.

I wish to never get a flat tire ever again.
 

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Granted. The U.S. government fails to raise the debt ceiling and is unable to pay off some of its debt. The credit rating of the United States drops to AA. China then comes and demands that the United States pay off the money that the United States owes to China. A war between the U.S. and China breaks out due to the increased tensions of the situation. The entire economy collapses. Money becomes near worthless. People resort to bartering. You will no longer get flat tires because you're forced to trade your car for a single piece of captain crunch due to an immense food shortage. The single piece of captain crunch was worth it. The war with China intensifies. You are drafted into the armed forces. You are brutally wounded and they must amputate both of your legs and your right arm. You also lose your left eye and get a wear a pirate patch. The war with China turns nuclear. You are now living in a nuclear waste land with one arm and one eye. You kill yourself in desperation and despair. A chinese platoon finds your dead rotting body later on, still sporting the allied forces uniform that you killed yourself in. They see this uniform and the entire platoon takes a turn pissing on your dead and pathetic corpse.

I wish I had a spaceship.
 
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Granted but it gets clamped just before take off, and you don't feel like paying the fee.

I wish toasters were quicker!
 
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They are, but they also automatically spread Marmite on all your toast.

I wish Spore had been a good game
Granted! However you became too addicted and your life took a different turn, so now you're a college drop out with out any steady income and about to commit a horrible crime so you can play for a while longer.

I wish i could think of a decent wish.
 
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Granted! However, the only thing you could think of was that you wanted to become a snail!

I wish there were 25 hours in a day!
 
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Granted but your schooling forces you to work on call for 2 days every week. Enjoy the extra 2 hours at work.

I wish the plant in my room grew euros :p
 
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You are. But it turns out Eon is nearby, and he decides to skin you and wear you as some form of scarf.

I wish I had a cold bear.
 
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You are. But it turns out Eon is nearby, and he decides to skin you and wear you as some form of scarf.

I wish I had a cold bear.
Granted! However he is in state of discomposure and the smell becomes unbearable (no pun intended)

I wish to become a cheezburger
 
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Enjoy your french kiss with that fat kid whos eating you XD

I wish the mars attacks movie was based on a real event :p
 
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Enjoy your french kiss with that fat kid whos eating you XD

I wish the mars attacks movie was based on a real event :p
Granted! However since i have never seen the movie you are instead crushed by tons of mars bars

I wish i had all the skateboarding skills of Rodney Mullen
 
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Granted but when out skateboarding you get hit by a car, the only damage you recieve is to your inner ear, you now have no sense of balance and can't even walk, let alone skateboard.

I wish I was a pasta chef.
 

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Granted. You are given the determination and drive to become a pasta chef. You quit your day job and enroll in a promising culinary institute to begin your journey. The hours are long and the critics are tough, but your willpower and determination is unrelenting. You become the best pasta chef in town and soon, the entire world. You're famous worldwide. The *****es love you, the money is good, and the pasta is delicious. However, unbeknownst to you, there are aliens covertly observing the planet earth. Seeing how much everyone loves you and your pasta, they decide to investigate and taste it for themselves to see if it's as good as it's made out to be. The aliens are floored with the quality and craftsmanship of your pasta. You truly are a master of your trade. The aliens are so delighted at the pasta you have created that they must have more of it. They kidnap you and bring you to your home planet in order for you to produce pasta non stop for them. You refuse. In retaliation, the aliens invade earth killing everyone you know or care about. You are the last human left alive, the sole survivor of a soon to be forgotten race. Worse, you have no one anymore with whom you wish to share your pasta with.

I wish I had a 2 dollar bill.
 
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Granted, unfortunately you were wiped along with the rest of the humans on earth, so now the money sits on earth doing nothing.

I wish all the humans on earth were restored.
 

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Granted. Cap J decides to stop being a douchebag and share his delicious pasta with the aliens. The aliens are overwhelmed with flavor and, as a thank you, they bring back all the humans to life and restore the Earth as it once was. Unfortunately, Cap J then decides to stop making Pasta again and everyone dies one final time.

I wish every balloon in the world turned into a frog at the stroke of 2:43 Pacific Standard Time on August 24th, 2011.
 
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Granted! However, the frog:balloon ratio has now been disrupted. The lack of balloons has also prompted the use of frogs as a substitute. It isn't pretty when they pop.

I wish it were the 1980's again! And I mean AD!
 
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Granted! However, the frog:balloon ratio has now been disrupted. The lack of balloons has also prompted the use of frogs as a substitute. It isn't pretty when they pop.

I wish it were the 1980's again! And I mean AD!
Granted! However now this means you have to wait even longer for ESF to be released.
On top of that you have to bear listening to cheesy 80's music while you wait.
Frustrated to no end, you take your own life to ease the pain.

I wish for a pair of panties.
 
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Granted, but after getting your wish, the Dragonball seems to be filled with darkness for a hundred years. Resulting in all Dragonballs to break and release all sorts of demons... wich kills you.

I wish my life would go on as nothing has ever happened or ever will.
 
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It does, but as it turns out, without anything happening, your neural synapses do not fire, and you do not detect that your wish has been granted.

I wish Cucumba would give me a footmassage.
 

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