your high school love?

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This is mainly out of a curiosity, and for the forum posters with actual experience. Lately I’ve been thinking about high school relationships. Everyone’s had high school experiences, and during those 4 years there MUST have been one girl/guy that you fell completely head over heels for. The person u felt that you were going to spend the rest of your life with, but as we grow older we tend to move on and mature, and with that loose our infatuation for that person. Every time I talk to someone older than me (30’s-40’s) there has always been that one person that they loved in high school and since this forum has 20 year olds and above in it, I was thinking maybe you would like to shed some insight on your high school love. Now I’m not talking about the girl you thought was REALLY hot. I’m talking about the person you met, got to know, and you felt you truly fell in love with, if you haven’t experienced this. Then please do me the favor of not posting, and if you have, then please answer the following questions within your summary of the experience.

How long did it last?
What caused it to end?(your feelings for that person)
Do you still keep in contact with that person?

And finally

Do you think that if someone has cheated on you, but your feelings are strong enough to take them back, that the relationship could work? Or do you feel that once trust is broken it can never be the same, and you will always trust that person less.
 
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Let's see. I started dating my high school love in December of my sophomore year. We ended up meeting at a Mormon dance(I was Mormon, she wasn't. I can't stand Mormon girls XD) and I got her number there. From then on, we spent a lot of time together, and to be honest, fell in love pretty quickly. It was definately a blast. However, she was a grade ahead of me so she left for college a year before me. She moved to a school about 6 hours away. From then on, things went kinda sour. She was bitter that I never could drive up to see her, I was bitter that she picked up some habits that I considered then to be nasty like drinking and smoking pot(I've since then have lightened up >_>) Anyway, finally things went real awry and we ended up breaking up over the phone, apparently she fell in love with another guy. I remember her exact words, "It's so hard when you're five hours away and he's only five minutes."

Anyway, her mom began to call me every once in a while and let me know how much of an ******* she was dating. I guess he told the girl's sister that he could get her any drug she wanted as long as she gave him a little time and such. About two weeks later, the dude had actually called up her parents to ask if he could marry my ex girlfriend. That really sucked to hear. They didn't give him permission, but that didn't stop them. They were engaged a month after our break up. A month after three years of dating :'(.

Last I heard from her, they moved to somewhere in Denver but aren't yet married. We email eachother on occasion, but we really shouldn't. I despise the man she's engaged to, and have too easy of time imagining him to be this real jerk who's somehow found what strings of hers to pull to get her to do as he wishes.

And for your last question, I'm very jealous by nature. It took me quite a bit of willpower to get over that, but just enough of it still remains. If I were to find out I've been cheated on, it would be over. My feelings for them would be strong, but between the feelings of betrayal and jealousy, I couldn't tae them back. Once trust is broken, it can slowly be earned back, but only slowly.
 
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Had a lot of experiences i suppose, and in reality they're pretty much all the same, only difference really is the person and what you do with them.

Nicole lasted about 7 months, she was my shortest relationship- =/ she technically lied to me and broke up with me for retarded reasons, turns out i found out a month later she dumped me for a different guy. When it ended i really didn't know how to feel. So i was pretty much angry and sad at the same time. So i'd have giant out bursts of hatred for her, and then in a seconds change i'd feel so sorry and want her back. Again, i didn't know how to feel, and it's really wierd. But i guess time heals all things, we don't talk anymore, she changed a lot from when i dated her to how she is now.

Rissa: About a year. But she got really clingy and i was just too young to be doing some of the stuff she was thinking of (marriage) I don't keep in contact with her either.

Amanda: she still likes me, i broke up with her for rissa >.> after rissa i got back together with Amanda again. Amanda.....she's pretty much a nympho... and i really couldn't handle that because i know in the past she's cheated on guys, and i know what it's like to be cheated on (tell you about her in a second) and i was afraid her....nympho...ness would get the best of her and be too vulnerable when i wasn't around. -.- we still talk all the time, and i plan on having her come out to CO to visit me sometime in the summer.

Kori: She's the girl that cheated on me, i thought we had it going great, everything was so awsome with her, but one day after school i skipped basketball practice to spend time with her, she kept avoiding me and crying and i caught her and talked it out of her, i pretty much walked away and died on the inside. She tried her hardest for me to take her back and constantly sent me stuff like gift cards, greeting cards that said i'm sorry things like that. I honestly feel once the trust is broken, it's broken, you can't gain trust back. (that's just me though) needless to say we don't talk anymore though i kind of wish we did now that i'm older and more mature

then there is Katie. She's the girl of my dreams and has been for 2 years. We get along so great but something.... happened, and we kinda parted ways for a while until i just had to start seeing/talking to her again. She has a fiance now =/ and we talk all the time and she is my date to Prom at 2 schools (i'm going to three proms)

As much as i want her to be as happy as humanely possible- her fiance and herself are going through a rough time and she might just drop the whole thing (good news for me i suppose) I guess Katie is my "high school love" more than anyone. And i really kinda hope things work out between us. And as self centered as this sounds i do hope she breaks up with James (her bf) for me. Which from the looks of it, might happen. Too bad we live 2,000 miles away.

There are more but like i said they're pretty much the same. Yet only one girl out of the total of... about 14 or so broke up with me, i ended the rest. =/

As for cheating.... no. I get cheated on, that's it, it's over. Will i still love her if i did love her? Yes, of course. But i wouldn't talk to them, or have anything to do with them. Pretty much like what Deman said except i don't think it can be gained back. And if it can it'd be over a period of years. Long hard earned years.
 
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I married her.
 
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can you tell us a little about how it worked out? "I married her" doesnt really cover how it went, just how it ended. I would also appreciate your opinion on my final question, in your case. Do you feel that if she wouldve cheated on you(or visa versa) that things wouldve still ended the same?
 
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Fire Phoenix, how old is Katie? She really already has a fiance? And she's still going to the prom with you? O_O

Let me tell you the bitter ending to almost all of these stories... they find somebody else. The power of convenience is immense... five hours and five minutes, just like Deman said.

I graduated last year, but she's still in high school. It's been somewhat long distance for seven months despite only being close for two (although I was her friend for a good while before that). See her on weekends and vacations and etc. I feel like if either of us met someone actually appealing then there could be trouble, the way these things always are... but we're both pretty unlucky at that I guess, and neither of us are incredible "needy" people. By that I mean that some people just feel need to be touched constantly, so they get sloppy at some party and screw up their relationship. Anyway, it's been working out pretty well.

That's the thing with all of these relationships though... in general, you're not gonna set a fire without an escape ladder.

As for cheating, I've kind of got a firm old fashioned belief in honor and words and bonds and all of that. If she cheats then it's over... too little willpower, I just don't want to have to worry about that crap. Not worth it.
 
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I have been freinds with my wife since I was 14. I am now 29. We began dating the October after graduation for me, she had graduated the year before. I had always appreciated her warmth and the good looks never hurt. I used to tutor her in math just so I could sneak glances at her legs and down her shirt ;-)

But that's just being attracted physically. If I had to nail it down to a moment when severe like turned into love, I'd have trouble. Her boyfreind at the time was a real peice of work. Controlling and abusive, he tried to shut her away so that only he had her, and only he decided whether or not she could feel good about herself. This went on for a few years, and for a while, I was his friend while she languished under his oppresiveness. He apparently forgot that I was friends with her first, telling me that he wanted to cheat on her with various people and do various things before tying the knot. It was clear he wanted to trap her in her pain forever, and it really didn't sit well with me. I was angered, and told myself that she should have someone better than him.

The natural conclusion was not me, however, I simply dropped hints her way that he was a slime. I was rewarded with a huge slap in front of all of my classmates, and he smiled as she burned her only bridge.

It took a while for Mephit and I to become friendly again, but when we did, all of my old needs to protect her from him appeared again.

During the summer after graduation, I danced with her at a function, and she was really happy for a change. He had demanded that she stay home and miss the dance because he was DJing, and didn't want her hanging around his friends. So I dance with her, as stated before. To a song from Beauty and the Beast of all things. I told myself once again, that she should smile like that all the time. But who was going to do that for her?

That October, we were all collaborating on a haunted house, and he began to attend classes at NYU, so I spent alot of time alone with her, prepping the house. She made me a meal, and we got frisky, and that night, we began something a little more than friendship. It had finally dawned on me that only I could garauntee that she'd be smiling more often.

When he found out, she needed time to decide. She asked us both to back off. I did as she asked, it was after all a three year relationship. He not only pressed hard, but he asked me to back off because we were once friends. Once she picked me, he got violent, stalking us, trying to run us off the road, and finally breaking into her house and punching her.

I am a calm man, and not prone to violence, but that one took the cake. I could understand being angry, but not to the point of assault. I began to stay at her house, very prepared to kick his ass, and he began to stay away.

Later that week, I knew that she was the one, I asked her to marry me. She told me to wait and see where we were in a year.

The next time I asked, she said yes. We have been together since that time, and I consider her a highschool sweetheart . . . after all, when the other girls broke my heart, I always ran to her for solace.

Now, for your question, no I do not believe a relationship can survive infidelity, I tried once, and failed miserably. (It became which one of us could be the bigger slut first, clearly, I won :p) I have never contemplated it while with Mephit, I can't imagine hurting her like that.
 
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I killed her.






But in all seriousness, my "highschool sweeties" were just the opposite. They were completely different people once you went out with them and it wasn't good. So I dated outside of my school. Hell I lost my virginity to a 24 yr old married mother. I prefer women who are not in highschool, never seemed to work out for me but I have had many good and long lasting relationships with college girls (College Freshman right now btw)
 
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Just a couple of weeks ago I ended a year long relationship with my one and only "high school love"

Basicly she just doesn't know what she wants, and the things she thinks she want are on a list to long for her to have them all at one time. She was kinda emotionaly manipulative, I hadn't realised how much she'd changed me until I ended it and was around my friends again. Anyway, after being with her for about 8 months she left for a 2 month holiday around europe- we both stayed loyal to each other talked on the phone etc- then she came back for 3 weeks (things were awesome) before leaving to the other side of the country for university, which we both already talked about and did to death, like we did with everything. The plan was I'd follow her over mid this year and we'd study and just live together for aslong as this little thing would last. And so preperations began to take place to make this thing work. Eventually phone calls ended up becoming painful orders drected at me, she'd just start making things harder for me, it all just started to hurt, and anything that the relationship used to be about was dead (this process also happened when she was in europe [distance really sucked for us]). So this one day I tried to break up with her, twice, in one day. Both times I came back apologising etc. I knew I didn't have the will power to be able to do it, I was far to dependant on her, and having someone to be with. I hatched a plan and ended up going to a party that weekend. I decided that I'd pretty much have to make her end this, so I had some drinks and as it got late and everybody left I stayed back and had drinks with the host. I ended up staying the night. I phoned the ex in the morning and told her the truth.
She has this funny habbit of not ever showing what she feels unless I almost force it out. So apparently even though the relationship seemed dead, she still wanted it all to still happen- and despite hating me, still wants me back.

Reading back over what I typed it sounds so drab and bland, and I find it hilarous I honestly don't care about that anymore after it being everythng to me. I guess I can't really get across everything that happened and the feeling involved here.

I haven't yet tried to keep in contact, she was to much apart of my life to just let go, and I still want her as a friend.

Oh and cheating = suck. I wouldn't take anyone that did back, and I'd expect the same in return.
 
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Well.. I've been had her as a friend for about 4 years.. Grew closer together and 1.5 years we started dating and started a relationship.. But, allthough she's 19 (I'm 20), she wasn't really grown up.. She never knew what exactly she wanted in a relationship and she would also fall in love way too fast, so we ended it 3-4 weeks ago..
We're still friends (still very close) but not in a relationship anymore.. Maybe one day, when she figured out what she wants, we get back together.. But I doubt that will ever happen..

PS: she never cheated on me, but she did have moments where she thought she was falling in love with someone..
 
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I'm still in school and the girl I fancy at the moment last told me me (to my face I might add) she'd rather be *** then go out with me... so I guess I've pretty much lost all hope of any kind of relationship in school but it's all boils down to one statement for me, "nice guys finish last" maybe thats being sexest but it's true for girls in the UK at least, and from at least from what I've seen (btw I'm 16)
 
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Ive known her for 5 years now and of those 5 years I have been inlove with her for a good 5 years.

I met her in my first highschool year and from the first time I saw her I knew there was something special about her. I never believed in "love at first sight" and I almost never change my mind. Im too damn proud too. I was proved terribly wrong on that one...

I was going out with my "primary school sweetheart" at that time and things where going great until I found out that she was cheating on me with my one friend. I called him up first and asked him what was going on and if the rumours where true. He said no... I called him the next day and made him tell me the truth. So he did.. and I, in my rage, threatend to kick his ass. I tried to call her up and demand an explanation but she never answerd the phone...

So I met THE girl on my first highschool day and as I said. I knew there was something special. Its hard to explain but she was like a magnet. I couldn't help but love her. I was still scared of getting hurt again and being betrayed so I didn't make a move but we where becoming rather good friends. We talked about some stuff we wouldn't talk about with anyone else and did the ussual best friend stuff. In grade 10 we where on this "field camp" thing and it was my birthday. She aranged a whole surprise party while hanging out with me.. pretty awesome.. I woke up on my birthday with a bunch of people in my room.. like 30 people and she was stting on my bed with a lot of presents and stuff. That was the best day of my live.

I was still pretty much usless and thought that she didn't like me (god Im stupid) so I left it at that and just remained friends...

In grade 11 I couldn't keep it in anymore. I decided that Valentines day was a good day and since Valentines day was the very next day I thought it a good idea. I went up to her and told her everthing. It took a while but I did it.. She listend and said that she didn't feel the same.. She said that she had the worlds respect for me, especially for telling her but she only liked me as a friend.

I wouldn't do anything to hurt her so I said that it was ok and that our friendship was important to me and all that stuff.. We left on good terms but inside I was dead..

We stayed good friends and still talked a lot and stuff but I still couldn't shake my feeling for her. I knew she liked Avril Lavigne so I took her to the concert and stuff and used up all my money for the whole year on that one day. Looking back on that day I would pay 100 times that for 5 seconds of that day. No, I didnt ask her out (again) even though she hinted. It felt wrong. I couldn't ask her and ruin the night for her if she didnt feel the same.

That was last year and we are still friends. She came to my work the other day and asked me to call her so we could go out somewhere.. So I decided that I was given one more shot and I shouldn't waste it.

I'll be asking her out soon.

Honestly, if she cheated on me I couldn't stand to leave her. It would be hard to build that trust again but I would give it my all.
 
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Only one I really have to share, and worth sharing. (Also a classic one)
It was when I was 14 years old.(I'm 18 now ;p).
I was just a normal student, walking around with my friends, doing football and just generally having fun. When we started our 9th grade, she moved to our town and started our shcool. This girl, at first I we never had contact, til one day when I was thrown out my classroom for being noisy or something, so I was sitting in the hallway. She had an test which she was done with and so she was also in the hall. As we both were alone, she came and sat down next to me, and introduced herself. I introduced myself and we hit a conversation. We actually sat there for about 30 minutes, and the class started again. The same day, she sent me an sms asking me for my MSN address, which I gave to her right after. She added me, and we talked for a long time, on daily basis. Every break at school, and several hours daily on MSN / sms / phone. So after about a month, she asked me if I could come over to her place to help her with some painting. Her parents were at their family cabin, so we were alone for the weekend. We painted a room on friday, and on saturday night we watched a movie. That's when it happend. She looked up to me with very gloomy eyes and kissed me after the movie ended. That's at least how all this started. The following 6 months, we spent almost every day together, and we did just about everything together.
She was playing a lot of football, and I was just going to the gym (at that time I was just casually working out, nothing extreme). One day, my best friend of course (who else), went on a football trip with their team.
They were away for a week, and when they returned, we continued where we left off. Happy, spending time together and so. However this time I noticed something was wrong. Her mind was a bit far off, and we didn't spend that much time together. While on the other hand, she spent a lot of time with my friend. I even found her at his place once, but they claimed they had a football project together.(I knew however this wasen't true).
A few weeks after, our relationship came to an end, and of course.... As kind as she was, she didn't have the heart to officially become my best friend's girl, so they kept it secret. I told him it was totally fine and to go ahead with whatever made them happy. Soon after, This was no longer even my friend, and it took me plainly about two years to get over her. The only good thing with this was that it made me extremly motivated to lift weights and do extreme workout. I was just another pissed teenager who had his heart "broken", and I let my anger out when I was working out. So my body started following my lead, and became larger and larger, til it got me where I am today. I do however regret very highly that I lost her, and I'd trade my current bodystate back to the old if I could have her without any hesitation.

Actually... My 18th birthday, about 4 weeks ago, she congratulated me and we've started talking awfully a lot again. Think I'm walking shroomy woods again, but a good thing I think.
 
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I haven't been out with anyone since 7th grade. Im currently a Sophomore, 15 yrs old. I dont know why I cant get a girlfriend, I guess I naturally come off as just your everyday average looking kid... thats pale, I think... ( Im not sure if I am considered pale or not).

I really need to post a picture of myself, it's getting old.
 
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Fire Phoenix, how old is Katie? She really already has a fiance? And she's still going to the prom with you?
She is 17 =/ I know, apparently she is the only one who doesn't think she's a little young. James is 21. He lives in Penn. whilst Katie lives in Rhode Island. (Kurt` you stalk her i'll kick your ass or something... even though i don't know what you look like =P)

We never really "dated" per se, because i never actually 'asked her out' but we went on some dates and pretty much talked on the phone every night- then stuff happened and stuff i moved away and at the time she was having trouble chosing me or him, and i was retarded back then (still can be) and talking stopped. She obviously picked james. They've been together for 1 year and 8 months.

Unfortunately things are turning out as Cuc's story has. James isn't being the great guy he used to be. (I never met him). You guys might know him eventually "Kids with issues" his band just cut a record deal. James is the guitarist/singer i think. Something like that.

But like all girls, they like to poke and prod and find out what's going on, so that's what she's doing. And knowing Katie she won't give up until he tells her what's wrong. And i get to be the guy she turns to for comfort because her boy friend is being a prick. Nothing more painful then listening to the girl of your dreams cry on the phone 2,000 miles away powerless to do anything =/ I get to do this every night.
 

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