SaiyanPrideXIX's Forum Fanfic...

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I wrote this while on break at work. I thought I'd post it and see what people thought of it as a beginning to a story. I adapted a character from a novel of mine and his background story and "DragonballZ-ified" it for the forums in a little exercise.

If anyone would like to join in, feel free. If not, crits and complaints are welcome. I need to improve my writing lately and could use the help.

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Chapter 1: The Last Esperian Elite

"My name is Raephion Lurius. I am an esper, and a soldier of the Elitist Empyreum Guard. On the honor of my fathers before me do I swear my family crest's honor to the Empyreum. I pledge my bravery to the leaders of the Empyreum, and my loyalty to they and the people whom they represent. Together, we are one. Collective. I am an Elite Warrior. I am an Esper. My name, is Raephion Lurius."

In his mind, Raephion repeated that oath in a psychic undertone. It was the only thing he could do to keep himself occupied in stasis; as an esper, a gifted psychic race, Raephion was completely unable to dream while in hypersleep because his control over his mind and body were too precise. Repeating this oath to himself psychically for weeks at a time while he slept in his uncomfortably cramped pod seemed the only thing he could do to pass the time without going insane.

The ship had been destroyed, and the Empyreum annihilated. The queen was long dead. As were most of the troops who had protected her. The attack had been too sudden; the enemy far too powerful, even for the might of the Empyreum Guard.

These three malevolent beings denoued themselves only as "The Advocates of Aldicron." Aldicron was the legendary life force that came to the esper homeworld millenia before and offered them the opportunity for superior evolution and prosperity, in exchange for the energy of the planet Terridia itself. The esperian leaders at the time had thought it was a win/win scenario.

The story of Aldicron's coming, and of Queen Vitaria's acceptance of his amazing gift (and it's grave consequences which then were yet to unfold) had gradually faded into the stuff of myth and legend over the centuries. The truth only became apparent when the advocates had arrived.

The abberant monstrous powers that were the three Advocates seemed nigh unstoppable. Despite even the most powerful Tier 2 warriors bearing their all, the mighty Advocates seemed able to regenerate with minimal effort. As a result, even the mightiest esperian warriors--including Raephion's peer, Urius--had fallen to the might of the Advocates.

Raephion was no coward, but he had known that he alone could not handle even one of these foes. Escaping with the Queen and the rest of the vital Empyreum members, Raephion and some others managed to escape the planet...as it was partially detonated, leaving it's glowing core exposed to the cold universe.

One of the Advocates pursued the ship, and destroyed it with ease, as well as all of its inhabitants save for Raephion, who escaped by the skin of his teeth. In fact, the only reason why Raephion was still alive is because the immense power used by the pursuing Advocate caused a rip in spacetime nearby, a wormhole which had readily swallowed Raephion's escape pod like so much water into a black cavernous recess.

Unbeknownst to him, Raephion's escape pod had been floating out in space for many, many years. The wormhole had ruptured and sent him clear across the universe.

Raephion was certain he would die. The pod had even run out of power at a point, and Raephion--still in hypersleep and unable to wake up--was forced to endure a horrible emptiness as the small debris of his people, with he locked helplessly in it's center, spun end to end across what may have been miles and years.

Raephion, out of starvation, went into a deep level of low-consciousness. While asleep his psychic mind could still operate freely, but he had reached apoint where that--something he did his entire life--had become too draining to attempt. His strength was faded. The mighty Elitist Protector had not only failed to save others, but he would fail to save himself.

A lapse of consciousness followed. A long one.

When Raephion came to--surprised to be coming to--his pod was opened, and he was in the center of a grassy field. Around the pod, a crater about 50 feet wide and 10 feet deep had extended. Raephion had expected the soil to have been hot and smoldering, but it wasn't. He had been lying here for some time, apparently. It was then that he realized there were others on this planet. Quickly stepping out of the pod and shaking off his physical fatigue, Raephion flexed his cut musculature and let the kinks and knots all right themselves.

A quick psychic scan of the area showed that this race--called "humans"--were not nearly of the evolutionary stature as his esperian gene pool had been. Raephion was shocked to see these creatures--while initially they looked so similar to the esperians he had always known as his people, he couldn't help but be appalled.

Aside from the general lack of psychic energy (which, to an esper, is considered a very primitive atmosphere), the people of this human race seemed horrifically deformed at regular intervals. While some were thin, pale, and frazzled, others could be more than three times their body's natural size, nearly exploding from their skins. Some had no hair at all by choice, and others helplessly disguised empty patches on the tops of their wrinkled, shiny heads. Deep wrinkles clouded skin at a mere childhood age of 40 or 50 years; the gravity here was so light that Raephion found it difficult to fathom the sagging lumps that littered the streets of Earth’s cities during this mid-day time many of them referred to as “lunch.“

Raephion scanned their minds as he meditated in that fairly empty woodland clearing where he'd landed. As the sun began to go down, Raephion had learned a great deal about the place called Earth, and the people who inhabited it.

The idea of unhealthiness, while alien to him, explained the seemingly erratic sizes and energies of these people. One thing remained, however--he still could not believe the simple and obvious fact that none of these beings were warriors, protectors. They lived almost entirely under the rule of something called "commerce." Most of them despised and distrusted one another vehemently, even their own children and life partners--called "spouses" or "lovers" here in this world.

Raephion wondered to himself. Was there not a heart of a warrior on this entire planet? Was there no place for him here?

And all the while unbeknownst to Raephion, this innocent world would be placed in the gravest of dangers by his presence, for one of the mighty Advocates was already on their way to intercept him....
 
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Shoulda posted a while ago, baaaaad memory..

It looks really good so far, you've obviously put a lot of work into it. I'd take part myself but I'm not really sure about the time period and at the moment I'm recovering from work. If you do keep this going though, I'll try and take part.

Great work. :)
 
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Good Job, I'll participate as soon as I find a place to hook in, Already got my char ready ^_^
 
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This is kind of lame, but leaves it open for someone to join in if they want. I was bored at work again. hehe.

Chapter 2: Ghosts of the Past

Raephion began to realize that the pod which he had used to get to Earth had been completely destroyed by this planet's atmosphere upon reentry. It was completely unable to be salvaged, and because of this Raephion realized that, beyond the shadow of a doubt, he was stranded here on this small, seemingly inconsequential world.

A hot yellow sun shined down as Raephion took off, flying with great speed to the south. He hadn't the slightest idea where he was going, or why--he just wanted to scream, and he knew he couldn't do that or any other sort of temper tantrum where he was in the city.

Before long he happened upon an open desert area, full of large steep cliffs and barren, bone-dry dirt and sand. It was here that Raephion finally let out his screams of frustration, which held and echoed in the canyons for almost as long as he held his mighty esperian lungs at their respective peaks.

If only I had been able to achieve the third Tier, Raephion spat at himself. If I had been able to breach my own barriers, I could have saved Urius and some of the others. I was the only one who had the time to pull it off, and I couldn't manage it. I've never been able to breach the third barrier, but Urius could, as could the others. If I had fought...if I had bought them more time...they could have lived...we could have regrouped...we could have done something...

But now it was too late. Raephion was alone. The last esper.

The Advocates of Aldicron's advantage had laid almost solely in the fact that they could gather and manipulate energy almost at will. Wielding Third-Tier strength with such ease made them able to catch most of the Empyreum by suprise; most of the strongest warriors were wiped out before even attempting to fight back.

Urius at Tier 2, fought gallantly, but he was simply overpowered. Had Raephion tried to buy him some time instead of trying to save and protect the Queen and the Empyreum Council, he might have been able to reach Tier 3 and would still be alive today.

Raephion mourned his fate out loud, in an echoing, heart-wrenching scream.

It was then that he felt something. Stopping short, he spun in place, searching for the source of it.

What he had felt was a psionic echo. He heard words but could not discern them; he felt energy but could not pinpoint it. In fact, it was as if the wave was coming from all around him.

Below, Raephion found the source: a great crater, hundreds of feet in width and depth, had been surged into the canyon below. Raephion landed too investigate.

Closing his eyes, concentrating deeply, Raephion listened to the echoes.

A great battle had taken place here. He listened and in the distance, Raephion heard voices that had spoken her long before he had ever arrived.

The voices of the combatants only confused Raephion. One spoke as a playful child might; the other, a raving lunatic who didn't seem as if he could manage to not scream at the top of his lungs. He could not discern which had been the one he would side with; the two seemed impossibly skewed in terms of good and evil, at least from what Raephion could discern.

The child-like voice was the possessor of far superior strength; the swaggering bellow that belonged to his opponent was speckled with frustration, disbelief, even defeat. Then peculiar instructions, the signal too weak and too far in the past for Raephion to really pinpoint:

"Take them and get as far away from here as you can."

Soon, Raephion detected a massive power surge--the very attack that created this crater that he now hovered in the center of. An awestruck Raephion felt the heat from possibly hundreds of years early as if the blast had only happened yesterday; its intensity was indescribable.

"Then warriors there are, amongst these...humans," Raephion mused to himself, even though he knew that neither of these fighters had been human in the least.

"This planet has seen its share of blasts and blows," Raephion mused. "There are more to come. I can only hope that somewhere this weak world has champions that remain to stand against the coming threat..."

And Raephion felt a horrible sting of guilt in his throat. He knew that he would likely be followed and eliminated; but now, the people of this world would be put in phenomenal danger. As soon as an advocate were to note the energy field that Raephion had just stumbled upon--more than likely over 100 earth years in age and STILL potent--then they would surely claim this planet and it's people next for their master.

And unless fighters like this one still existed on Earth, then any one of the Advocates would be more than adequate to wipe out the entire face of the planet without much difficulty.

Raephion feared for his life, and for the life of the Earth.

His eyes flared with anger and frustration; this was no one's fault but his own. More innocents dead.

No, Raephion decided. His burning anger and hatred turned to determination and renewed vigor. "I vow unto you, Aldicron--I will destroy your three advocates or die trying!!"

Raephion was a tactician; he knew that this goal was out of his reach...but surely there were others. Surely there was someone who would stand with him in defense of his species and the Earth itself?

Meditating for a moment, Raephion thought to himself. It is my responsibility. I must warn the defenders of this planet of the coming doom I have wrought upon them. I must be prepared, and I cannot prepare alone. The Advocates will destroy everything in their path, and if I do not stand and fight--if WE do not stand and fight--then our universe as we know it will be done for.

Quickly, Raephion reached out as hard as he could, powering up to a higher level and letting his own white aura show. Rocks and dust kicked up as he heightened his strength, and scanned with his mind.

There.

Detecting a powerful entity at extra long range, Raephion immediately powered up close to Vitarian Tier 1, and bolted at his highest inconspicuous speed.

Aggression had always dictated Raephion, and now things had been no different. As he flew, he though simply one thing to himself:

I sense strength and power radiating far off to the south. Whoever you are, you must help me...or so shall we both perish along with this rock.

There was of course one other possibility, a more likely one: the power Raephion had sensed in the distance could've been one of the Advocates.

Ready for anything, Raephion blasted ahead, his dark hair flapping wildly in the wind sheer of his own speed. One way or another, every second counted...

...And deep in space, an Advocate flying through the cold void smirked, with the same thought in his heart, for he knew that the blue planet now coming into his line of sight over the black horizon was where he would find Raephion Lurius...and destroy the last threat to Aldicron once and for all.
 
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Hey are you still writing this, im just kinda wondering.
 

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