If you are on Steam, this should work. No you don't need AMX or Metamod, those are Server addons, not essentials. Just Create you game, type sv_lan "0" then restart your server (type restart in console).
I don't think so, but your friends should still be able to join your server if they use HL's Filter feature. I'm sure you could disable a port, but I'm not really sure how to do that.
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