The Duke of Juke
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/asimov-laws-robotics.php?page=1
My favorites:
My favorites:
4. A robot may not subject a human being to ridicule on the basis of weight, personal hygiene or financial standing, unless such ridicule would prevent a second human being from coming to the sort of harm that results from missing out on a good chortle.
8. A robot may not act in such a fashion as would make dogs obsolete, because dogs are less expensive than robots, and robots should be reserved for science things.
12. A robot must attempt to be courteous and civil to human beings at all times, even if the robot is just one of those robot arms that puts things together in a factory, because they should at least make the effort.
19. A robot must pretend to be interested when a human being tells it his dreams, but a human being bears no obligation to humor a robot when the circumstance is reversed.