Miro-Fu?!? Wanna have a go?(FIGHT CLUB)

The Duke of Juke
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Tell you guys what. I'm feeling pretty ****y. And the only way to get rid of my super-ego is to have it deflated in a good old fashion brawl. So, who wants to give it a shot?

I challenge any takers!
 
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aw man how i would love to accept this challenge due to my boredom but i dont wanna get owned again by Miroku
 
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We'll have a rematch later, but for now, I want some fresh meat
 
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I'll referee the rematch as well.

The venue will be Evil Miroku's basement, complete with furnace, boxes, holiday decorations, ping pong table, lawn tools and anything else Evil Miroku might have hidden down there.
 
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Deverz, I said I wanted some fresh meat. Not some stinkin' rancid piece of YOU!

Oh well. We'll give you another try. Just don't go crying to Cuc when I beat you down.
 
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I've beat you down once I can beat you down again

prepare to die scum
 
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Before I begin, I'm going to title this fight "Miro-fu: Gaiden!" I'll be Evil Miroku, but it will be a kind of what-if type side story that has nothing to do with Magus' Fanfic. Just clearing that up for anybody who reads this.

The door creaks open and Deverz takes a look down into the darkness. "Miroku? You down there?"

"Yeah, could you please help me out though?"

"What's wrong?"

"Well, it's embarassing. I kind of tripped on the way down the stairs. My noggin's alright, but I think my ankle may be twisted."

"I'll be right down."

FLICK! Devers turns on the light and see's Miroku lying on the ground grasping his ankle. He carefuly walks down the stairs, each board cracking underfoot. One step gives under just a little more than the others, and Deverz nearly stumbles. "No wonder you fell" he states as he quickly rebalances himself. After what seems like an eternity to Miroku, Deverz eventually makes it to the bottom.

"Here we go, I'll help you get up the stairs. Give me your hand"

Deverz reaches reaches out and Miroku firmly grasps his hand. Deverz feels a slight tug for a moment, then finds himself instantly slammed into the furnace across the room.

"Damn, if I known that I could have tricked you that easily ten minutes ago, I would have left the door to the furnace open and turned it on, Then this would already be over. I'll make a mental note of that. Maybe in my exploits I'll find a way to timetravel."

"What the hell was that for? Tell me you aren't sore over me kicking your ass for busting into my kitchen."

"Naw, it's not over that. My ambitions were simple that day. Get your little black book for all the digits of your playmates. No, today I have a different goal."

"Really, and what's that?" Deverz grabs onto the sides of the furnace and uprights himself.

"I think I'll wait to tell you." Miroku reaches to his left and grabs a rake. Deverz quickly looks around for a weapon and finds none. He gives two more glances in despare. "Too bad I don't really feel the need to keep things even. Besides, you're an admin, you should be able to handle yourself."

Miroku deftly twirls the rake around his head and rushes Deverz. Even Deverz trained eye's hardly see the movement, and a sharp jab in the stomach soon follows. Miroku twirls and uses the prongs of the rake to hook behind Deverz legs and trip him. Miroku twirls the rake once more over his head and brings the wooden end down on Deverz head, the end explodes, and splinters shower down onto Deverz limp body.

"Heh. Now here's where you think I'm going to underestimate you. But truth is, I know you aren't down yet. Don't even try fooling me."

Miroku takes two steps back and readies himself for another attack. He looks down at the pathetic admin and laughs. Deverz strains as he reaches out, and looks behind Miroku. "Save the facade for somebody who won't see through it. You can't fool me into thinking you're already down for th..."

Miroku's last two words get cut off as a ping-pong table smashes into him from the side, then carries him into the wall. Miroku pushes the ping-pong table down, but is assaulted by a set of poolballs from a box next to Deverz.

Miroku tries in vain to deflect each ball with the remainng foot of his rake, but several strike him hard and bruise deep. "Cute, Deverz. You did catch me off-guard. I'm not going to say it's not going to happen again, because that will just set it in stone."

"I'm not even warmed up yet." Deverz again uprights himself, this time using The Force to support himself.

"Silly fool. The Force is a much weaker power than you realize. Allow me to show you"
 
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Deverz climbs in a window to Miroku's basement then mutters to himself "That was a better entrance then Miroku made to my kitchen. I'm still fixing the damn thing." Deverz eye suddenly twitches as he remembers the bill. "Oh boy is he gonna pay for that again."

Deverz looks around the room seeing a Pool tabe just infront of him, An air hockey table other the otherside. A couch and TV in the middle and some strange door behind the TV.

"Time to get to work."
Deverz then smashes the Pool table in half, then hears a door open up the top of the basement stairs over near the air hockey table.
Deverz grabs a couple of Pool balls then throws them just as Miroku steps into the basement. One smashing on the wall just infront of Miroku's face the other smacking him right in the side of the head.
Deverz then throws another at the TV smaching that too.

Miroku gets up. "WTF ARE YOU DOING!!!"
Deverz replies simply with. "You wreak my kitchen and attempt to beat my ass. I'll destroy your basement and beat your ass again"

Miroku rubs the side of his head then rips a section of handrail from the stairs and charges at Deverz.

Deverz blocks the handrail as Miroku swings it but fails to block the trip. Miroku then punches Deverz in the throat. Then in the face twice caushing him to start bleeding from the nose and above the eye.

Deverz responds with grabbing Miroku then kicking him over his head into the wall leaving a big hole. Deverz then grabs Miroku seeing the previously un-noticed furnace in the corner of his eye swings him into it. Flames burst out singeing Miroku.

Miroku falls to the floor and cough's and mutters "Wait until you see what's behind that door"
Deverz just laughs and says "The door might make things more fun for me." as some hedge clippers land near Miroku's legs
 
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/me pokes Cucumba

I know you've been on, Judge us kthxplz
 
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You're gonna need to do more than that Deverz. Nice carry over from the previous fight, but your start was lackluster.

Miroku wins this round despite his heavy-on-plot approach.
 
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Miroku pulls out a variety of evil looking objects then begins to glow an eerie red as the room darkens

Deverz looks around and says, "You should get someone to check out the wiring in this place. Also that glow can't be healthy"
Miroku lets out an annoyed grunt and replies angrily with "YOU FOOL THATS MY POWER NOT SOME HEALTH PROBLEM"
"Oh, Very umm... pretty. I still think the force is better you can't kill people with light shows really."

Miroku grunts again and throws an old Christmas tree at Deverz then charges him. Deverz just glides to the side and sticks his leg out tripping Miroku.
“Fool you should know by now that I posses a more power then you could ever imagine. The force is much stronger in me then any glow power you might have”
Miroku begins to glow brighter as the room turns pitch black.
“Haha idiot, now you can’t see me.” Deverz waves his hand in Miroku’s direction sending him flying into a box of fireworks he was saving for the 4th of July. Some of them go off and fly past Deverz giving Miroku an indication of where he is.

Miroku moves at the speed of light towards Deverz and punches him in the stomach. Deverz cough’s up some blood as Miroku then slams his elbow into Deverz back causing him to fall to the ground.
Deverz gets up mutters something about cheese and looks Miroku in the face then leaps back into the darkness

Miroku strains to see or hear any hint of Deverz but doesn’t see him until a fist strikes him in the stomach and a knee smacks him in the face.

Deverz then moves back into the darkness and says from seemingly nowhere. “Those weapons of yours do anything or just decoration. Look I’ll help you out a bit.” Deverz ignites his saber. “There now you can see me and I can see you. Now do something worthy of a fight.”
 
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Miroku opened up his eye to the Darkness and let it flow into him. Using his left arm he relocated his shoulder that was knocked out of place by one of the pool balls.

"The Darkness gives me new sight, Deverz. I can see how the Force flows through you and easily cut it off before it even reaches me."

"Is that so, Miroku?" Deverz focuses on another stack of boxes and flings them at Miroku using the force once again. Miroku looks at the boxes, laughs and with a few swipes in the air with his hand, the boxes fall motionless.

"Any trainee could stop boxes like that."

"Yeppers. He sure could. But trust me, there is much more I can do"

"pssh... stupid woman. I'm getting sick of you talking, and I'm getting sick of you talking about how much better you are.

"heh."

Miroku leaps forwards, spins in the air and catches Deverz in the head with a hook from his left foot. Deverz starts to fly into the wall head first, but Miroku catches an ankle and with the Darkness gives Deverz a nice shock. Deverz muscles tighten in reflex to the shock. Miroku giggles like a mad man and gives him another, harder shock. Deverz muscles tighten again, but this time his left ankle snaps thanks to all his muscles contracting in unison. Miroku flings Deverz across the room onto the steep staircase.

Devers hits the stairs and pull himself onto his right foot wincingly. "Nice trick kiddo, but I'm done playing." Deverz reaches behind him and pulls out his light saber, igniting it in an instant. Deverz leaps off the stairs and lands on his good foot, but he rolls to lessen the stress on his leg. Miroku takes a couple steps forward and takes a few swings at Deverz. Deverz sways out of the way of each punch and takes a few swings at Miroku with the saber. Miroku sidesteps each swing, but a lucky one catches him in the arm, severing it at mid bicep.

"Holy **** that burns like a mother!" Miroku rubs the instantly cauterized wound. "It's nice to see all that you'll give to stop me, but I'll stop you first..."

Deverz attacks once again, Miroku dancing around the saber even faster. Deverz strains to keep up the pace, but as he takes his thirtieth swing, Miroku punches Deverz in the stomach and channels all the Darkness he can muster into Deverz body. Deverz flails wildly and lands in the floor in a spasm.

"Ha, fool. Shouldn't have come, now you're dead..."

Miroku reaches and picks up his dismemberment and walks up the stairs when he hears Deverz grunt.

"Still alive? Heh... I'll let you live, I've got better things to do"
 
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You started nice Miroku, but the second and third attacks were clearly slack compared to the first.

This round is Deverz's, though Dev should concentrate on not making sportscasts.
 
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The glow of the saber eerily fills the room, giving Miroku back his vision. "Heh. Crap you surprised me. You've gotten a lot stronger than you were during our little altercation in your kitchen. But I can't say that you're bansaber is such a great idea. Sure it's one of your only chances against me, but I think you were better off in the dark." Miroku takes a step back and kicks the wall twice. A mechanical groan reverberates off the walls as one of them behind Deverz slides up. The room is dimly lit and rows of cages can be seen lining its walls.

"You see, not many people know truly what evil is. I can show you."

Deverz twirls the saber around, the hum rivaling the groan of the secret door. "Eh, you've got me to go through to get to that door. And trust me, there's no way that's going to happen." Deverz leaps forward swinging the saber over his head. Miroku sidesteps and attempts a powerful sidekick to Deverz kidneys, but Deverz gracefully spins to the side swinging the saber downward to Miroku's leg. Miroku withdraws his leg quickly, but the saber slices through the toe of his boot. Miroku, feeling a burning sensation, leaps back and takes a quick toe count. "All there but you did manage to singe my toenail. That's cool though, burnt toenail is one of the worst smells in the world." Miroku moonsaults back into action and lands on Deverz shoulders, wrapping his legs round the Dog of War's neck, feeling a few peculiar pricks along his inner thighs. Miroku arches his back and grabs onto the stair's railing. He pulls hard bringing Deverz up with him, and with a little flick of his hips, sends Deverz crashing into the low ceiling. Deverz skull hits with a sickening thud, and his limp body falls to the floor. Miroku swings off the rail somersaulting in mid-air, landing down on Deverz left shoulder with a crack. The saber retracts and the basement is lit only by the secret room.

"Get up Deverz. I know you're just playing dead."

Miroku gives the poor wretch a quick sharp kick to the ribs.

"Fine. I'll just let you lie there. Hmm...?" A twinkle coming from Deverz neck catches Miroku's eyes. Miroku reaches over and removes the spiked collar from Deverz. "That's what I felt poking me... I've always had an eye for shiny things. I'll put this on one of my pets as a reminder of you."

Miroku starts to make his way back up the stairs when he hears Deverz say with a deep voice, "You shouldn't have done that. That was the only thing keeping you alive."

Miroku twirls quickly around to see what the hell the delusional fool is talking about.

"You've unleashed the Dog of War." Deverz grunts with a throaty voice. Deverz stands up, a footprint still visible on his crushed shoulder. Deverz inhales deeply and his muscles bulge out a bit. His nose and mouth protrude from the rest of his face as thick brissly hair sprouts all over his body. His fingernails grow sharper and harder, gaining a few inches length. Sickening cracks can be heard all over his body as his bones grow, shrink, or change shape. His once crushed shoulder pops back into it's regular shape.

"There we go, this is what I'm talking about!" Miroku's glee is hardly contained and he flashes Deverz a toothy grin.

Deverz growls and leaps towards Miroku powerfully, but Miroku rolls underneath the beast's attack. Miroku springs up to his feet as Deverz leaps into the wall and jumps off it, pouncing towards Miroku a second time. Miroku rolls once again, this time to the left of the powerful tackle. Deverz hits the ground hard, minute cracks forming underneath his feat, but he is unnaffected by his own force. Deverz readies himself for another pounce as Miroku readies himself for another roll. Miroku eyes Deverz powerful leg muscles and the second he sees them tense up to pounce, he rolls again. But unfortunately for the evilly overpowered mod, Deverz was only feinting. Deverz smashes down on Miroku mid-roll, forcing him down onto the ground. Miroku's ribs crack as Deverz claws dig into his chest. Finding the space between Miroku's ribs perfect for grasping, Deverz clenches tightly then throws Miroku into the wall. With great speed the mighty dog drives Miroku farther into the wall with his shoulder before the mod can fall to the ground. Miroku gasps for air, but the Admin's shoulder prevents any from reaching his lungs. With lack of oxygen, Miroku feels himself fading from the world of concsiousness. Deverz feels Miroku go limp.

Deverz pulls away from the body and takes two steps backward. "Heh. Poor guy was surprised. Bet he didn't know that my title of 'Dog of War' was literal." Deverz walks over to the collar, but before he reaches it his enhanced hearing picks up a quick rustling noise. Deverz slowly turns to find Miroku standing by the open door.

"I did a little research at the hidden archives, Deverz. I've known long about your little secret. Which is why I've devised one of my most evil plans. Your sweat from your transformation has a very unique make up. Very easy to pick out if you've got the right equipment." Miroku walks into the room and throws a lever. All the cage doors open and thousands of tinny little fuzzballs with a metallic glitter coming from their backs spill onto the floor. "You see these little guys? Hamsters. See what they've got strapped to their backs? Lasers. I've genetically modified the hamsters to tune into your unique smell. That same smell is what the lasers guidance systems locks on to. Told you I was evil."

Deverz takes a step back as the little guys rush him, red beams burning into his skin. The smell of burnt hair and flesh fill up the room. "The lasers aren't powerful enough to kill you right away Mr. Dog, but given enough time they will kill you." Deverz becomes panicky, his body locking up in shock. How the hell could he manage to escape this predicament. Miroku looked onward as the Admin falls to the ground, covered by a tsunami of the hairballs. But the wave subsides and all the hamsters make their way back to the cages.

"Hmm... whats this? I didn't expect you to die that quickly." Miroku steps around the furry rush, so as not to make them angry, and makes his way to the fallen Admins body, reverted to its natural state. "Hmm... still breathing? Thats strange."

Miroku bends over to examine when he sees that the Admin managed to re-collar himself in time.

"Smart guy. The hamsters were attracted to your transformed state, so you made sure you weren't in that state."

Miroku walks to the wall and pushes the button that closes the door after all the hamsters are happily eating their pellets in the cages. Miroku pushes a button on his moderator badge. "Hey guys!!! Deverz has been attacked!! I found him here in my basement and he's pretty damaged!!! I'm afraid to move him so be sure to get some medical personel down here as soon as you can!!"

Miroku giggles and sits down on a box of old photo albums.
 
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I might be late with my attack, I'm going out tonight and I have work tomorrow

Says the guy who wouldn't let me RP in peace friday night;) Alrighty, I expect you to think of the fight while you're out and while at work. And while sleeping. And when you're with that special lady. I want to barely win, not win by a landslide
~Miroku
 
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“Oh they do a lot more then look pretty, a lot more. Allow me to demonstrate.”

As Miroku’s words fade of the patch of red that is him become a blur and a sharp pain appears in Deverz cheek and blood starts to trickle down.

“Your now infected with my special virus that infects all that are strong with the force. You will be down and out within the next 10 mins.”

“You’ll be down and out long before then.” With that Deverz spins on the spot and smacks his saber hilt into Miroku’s temple. Miroku stumbles about a bit then falls to his knees. Deverz twirls his saber around and looks down at his foe.

Miroku smirks and looks up at Deverz as he presses a few buttons on his wrist. Long metallic arms come out of the wall behind Deverz and drag his back and hold him down.

Miroku concentrates for a couple of seconds then the whole room goes pitch black including Miroku himself. Not even the glow of the admins mighty ban saber can be seen.

In the dark Miroku gets up and with the new surge of power fly’s across the room and crushes Deverz into the wall sending large cracks over the whole room just as the arms relinquish their grip. Both Miroku and Deverz fall to the ground as normal light returns to the room. Deverz groans in pain and coughs up some blood.

“Silly fool using all your power in that attack.” Getting up Deverz hobbles over to Miroku and quickly cuts 'Dev' into Miroku’s chest and gives him a quick punch in the nose.

Looking down Deverz notices the Moderator badge on Miroku’s chest. Deverz reaches down and rips it off. “Come claim this back off me when you feel up to it.” Deverz says to the unconscious Miroku as he walks off. At the top of the stairs Deverz looks at his watch “3mins to spare, and I think Miroku using all his power on me like that cured me.” Deverz then sits at the top of the stairs and waits to heal and regain power.
 
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Miroku, your post was awesome, full of detail. The laser adorned hamsters were also cool. The archives dig was also funny.

Dev, your fight was an exercise in force, you had everything from biological warfare to the classic "Z" cut. :p

I'm going to have to give this round to Miroku (and subsequently the match as well), his post flowed a little better. Dev you need to concentrate on expanding the details, your fight club posts sometimes read like sportscasts.
 
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Wow, this isn't incredibly retarted >.>

Just when I thought I had no life
 
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I'll choose not to subtract from Deverz rep because he did damn good. I almost thought this was going to be a repeat of his kitchen.

Good job man
 

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